Many of you reading this probably have already heard of or know about Allume.  But if not let me just tell you a little about it.

Allume is a blogging conference.  In their words: “Our goal at Allume is to minister to the woman, the blogger, the story teller. We want to love well, encourage, and spur women on to shine the Light that lives within them. We want to serve you in ways that cultivate the Light of Christ in you, help you expand your influence, use your influence well (in your home, your community, or around the world) and encourage you with stories of those who are living out that Light.”

I heard about this conference last year…and wanted to go – but the finances just weren’t there, and it wasn’t something I felt I could or should make a priority. But after being accepted and added as a part of Holley’s dream-team, starting this blog and finding a bit of my “voice”, the desire to grow this space has developed inside of me.

I want to find a way to encourage here. To share my story – God’s story in my life, and to hear yours.  I have found so much encouragement in this community of bloggers. I have once again found my passion for writing and story-telling….something that for many years was long forgotten. And I don’t want to let it go again.

So today I took a small step of faith and I ordered a ticket for Allume.  I did so with the understanding that they sell out quickly, and if worse came to worse and I couldn’t go….I could easily find someone to buy my ticket.

But I don’t want to have to sell my ticket. I want to go (even though it scares me to death). I want to learn and grow by hearing stories from those people that have already walked this path. And I want to meet some of my fellow dreamer sisters in person!

But these things come at a cost. The ticket, the hotel, the flight to South Carolina….it all adds up. So I have heard other bloggers talk about sponsorship etc., and honestly I don’t know how to go about any of it….so I am asking you. My wise friends. 🙂

If you have walked this road before and have any tips, would you be so kind to share them with me? I don’t even really know where to start…but I feel like this is something that I NEED to do….so I am willing to be a little uncomfortable while learning how to follow this dream!

And if you are reading this and are also attending Allume would you leave me a comment and let me know – I’d love to connect! 🙂

My dreamer-sisters,

This “following your dreams” business can be tough can’t it?! 🙂  I know, I have been there, and in all honesty I am still there at times. There are some days that I spend more time believing the lies than walking in the freedom of God’s plan for my life.

I want you to hear me though…on the hardest days, the days you feel stuck or the days you feel you have moved backward….God knew these days would come, He knew that He could use this for His glory. Take heart in that my friends and keep pressing forward!

The bible verse I studies this morning was Psalm 40:4-8 and it fits for this time in my life. And I think it will fit for you too…

We can’t and we won’t always see the end result…..but if we are following in God’s plan for our lives – there will be fruit.

Today, wherever you find yourself, thank God. When thankfulness fills our hearts, it is easier to handle the difficult, and easier to see God’s hand in all of it.  Don’t give up, don’t stop seeking after His plan. Some day you will look back and see where the “right-nows” formed you into the amazing woman God has planned you to be!!

And know that I am walking right there with you. If you have a prayer request as you discover all the dreams God has for you – please share it….I would be honored to pray for you!

Much love,

Your dreamer-sister

This week’s challenge:  Write a post that’s titled “A Letter to the God-sized Dreamers” and tell your God-sized dreaming sisters why we need them and their dreams–especially when it’s hard. Have you joined us in this journey?? If so please link up over here and share your story!!  Holley’s new book is finally available!! If you don’t have a copy yet – you can find it here! 🙂

This weeks “dream” challenge was to “Find a God-sized dream story that inspires you and share it with us”

Well this is an easy post to write because I have some amazing dreamers in my own “backyard” if you will!

Both of my parents are in the medical field – in fact they both went to the same college and graduated as RN’s.  For a long time my dad worked in a more administrative job and wasn’t seeing/helping patients as he had wanted. So when I was a teenager he made the scary decision to go back to school to become a Physician’s Assistant (PA).

And the college was in a neighboring state – so both he and my mom had to make sacrifices. But she supported him so that he could “chase” his dream! It was pretty awesome seeing him graduate and get a job doing what he loved – helping others!

For many years while my siblings and I were growing up my mom didn’t work much – well let me rephrase that – she worked hard for our family at home but didn’t work much out of the home! 🙂 And I remember that she was always there after school when we came home.

But when we were all out of the house and on our own she got an opportunity to teach nursing classes for a local University. After she started, the University changed their “rules” a bit and required that all teachers have a Masters degree.

So when my mom was in her “29’s” 😉 (right mom?!) she went back to college and got her Masters!! When I think about people chasing their dreams I think about my parents. It didn’t matter their ages, they recognized there would be sacrifices…and they knew it wasn’t going to be easy – but they just did it!!

In 2009 they stumbled across what would become another dream….

They were traveling in MN and got “lost”. They stopped at a diner to eat and they saw this advertisement for something called Kids Against Hunger. It was an organization that was using volunteers to package food to be sent to starving children.

My dad has a huge heart for missions. He has been all over the world of various mission trips and has even taken my oldest son with him to Haiti twice. He has seen first hand the devastation that hunger causes and knew that they needed to do something.

So they took some of their own retirement money and started a satellite KAH site in Sioux Falls, SD!!

From August 2009 through August 2012 the Sioux Falls site has packaged over 2 MILLION meals! Meals that have been shipped to Haiti and meals that have been given to the local backpack program for kids in the school system.

Talk about taking a seed, planting it, praying for growth and seeing major return! And what is so awesome about all of this is that my parents have not “profited” from the success of KAH. They don’t get a salary or get to keep a portion of the donations for themselves. All donations go to paying for the different products that go into the making of the meals.

And it is making a difference in the lives of children.

Proud isn’t a big enough word really – but I am constantly inspired to do more, to give more – without the expectation of gain in return, because I have watched my parents be that example…these can be my “lessons” as I follow my own God-sized dreams.

Sometimes I get depressed and feel like things aren’t going fast enough….but in going through this process of reflection I am encouraged that sometimes the “dream” doesn’t happen on our schedule…but the wait is worth it!!

I am learning that I need to say “yes” to some smaller things now in this journey, this dream of mine….as I work towards the bigger goal of becoming a writer. Be that in print – or just here as someone who encourages in their own little part of the www.

I can’t expect to move forward if I am not taking some action.

But sometimes this dream can become another part of my life that feels overwhelming. Another thing that pulls me from my primary responsibilities as a wife and a mother.

And at times if feels like those areas in my life need the most “work” – especially if I want to be living out what I am “preaching” here!

So I am trying to say “yes” to those things that are most important – recognizing that by having a right focus….it will only lead me to become better at those very things that I want for this space.  If I can be a light in my own home – then sharing my experiences here, so as to encourage others, will not seem like “work”, or overwhelming…but instead as an extended blessing to all that God has given me to do.

There are a couple of things that I am doing to try and stay on track….

First I have joined the Hello Mornings Bible Study. If you haven’t ever heard of HM – click on the link and check it out. We are doing a study on Hope right now. So each morning I start my day with reading and discussing a different portion of Scripture focused on the Hope we have in God!

I also am trying to spend any free time I have reading good books – I just finished “Beyond Ordinary” (that I won in a giveaway)…and it is a book about taking your marriage from ordinary to extraordinary! Good stuff….and for me a better focus than say watching TV.

And finally (and the thing I still need help with) is I am praying about finding an accountability partner. Someone that I can be in contact with…who will ask me how I am doing in my roles as a wife and a mother…and someone that understands my dream for this space as well!

I would love to say that the road to my bigger dream is easy, or fast….

But what I am finding is that as long as I am willing to say “yes” to those little, but important things, along the way….the journey is becoming more important than the final destination!

And that my friends is pretty awesome!

Wow – I was blown away at all the wonderful comments, and amazing dreams shared by so many in this giveaway post. I wish that I was able to send each of you Holley’s book. Unfortunately I was only able to pick our 13 winners – and here they are. Drawn randomly and in no particular order….

Kate, Erin, Jess, Amber, Courtney, Kelley, Elizabeth May, Regan, Karissa, Stephanie, Amanda, Jessica and Lisa L!

Congrats ladies – you all should have received an e-mail from me tonight asking for your mailing address.

Thank you again to everyone who entered…I prayed over each of your God-sized dreams and would love to hear when they blossom and grow!

Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday. I love this because it is just a commitment of five minutes of unedited writing….we can all do that can’t we?? So if you haven’t started this series yet…today’s the day!

Today’s word is BELOVED – ready, set go –

I will be honest – I almost didn’t post this morning. It was a rough night with our sick little girl and I didn’t sleep much.

When I finally got up I was feeling a little crabby….well a lot crabby! 😉

But i started thinking about the word Beloved for today and what it means….

And I think that my night, laying next to my only daughter while she tossed and turned, coughed and cried, envelops what being beloved is.

My girl is dearly loved…and sometimes as parents we have to show them that love in sacrificial ways.  Even if it means we are tired and crabby in the morning! But she is worth it….they all are!

So while I am weary this morning, I know that she was taken care of.

And I know that God loves me in that same sacrificial way….at times I am sure He grows weary of my tossing and turning about….but He is right there by my side, through the dark….always reminding me that I am His.

Beloved.

CONTEST NOW CLOSED – I will be announcing the winners shortly! Thank you to everyone who entered – reading your dreams were such a blessing!! 🙂

Stop the presses!! (I’ve always wanted to say that!) 😉 No but seriously…I have a HUGE update on my giveaway!! I am so excited I can hardly stand it!!

After reading and being inspired by so many awesome dream ideas…a wonderful angel (who would like to remain anonymous) felt God calling her to help in this giveaway and donate another 10 copies of Holley’s book!! Can you believe it?! I know…I can’t either!

So needless to say 13 wonderful dreamers will be blessed with a copy of this book!! WOO HOO! So what are you waiting for friends?! Get to entering!!

(Original post)

If you don’t know my friend Holley or haven’t visited her blog….well you should! Holley is a writer and encourager and has put together this lovely “dream-team” that I am involved with. And she has written this amazing book – “You’re Made for a God-Sized Dream”

I had the chance to order a copy before it is released to the public and decided that it would be even more fun if I gave a couple of them away here to share in the love!! YAY!

So in honor of Valentines Day I am loving on 3 lucky people with a copy of Holley’s book! Entering is simple….just leave a comment below sharing a dream you have had for yourself! I will pick the winners on Monday February 18th!  Or and make sure to leave me your email address if it isn’t in your sign on so I can contact you if you win! 🙂

And even if your day isn’t filled with roses, chocolates or a singing barbershop quartet…remember that you are fully loved by God – with a love greater than any earthly gift you can receive…be filled with that truth today!!

** I am linking up today with Kasey (a sweet dreamer-friend) to discuss “Marriage and Mommyhood – finding grace in the balance”.  Unfortunately (for me) I seem to have a lot of “material” in this area…so I am excited to join in today!**

Parenting/Motherhood is HARD. Can I get an Amen?! 😉

Seriously though….have you ever met a mother that says parenting is the easiest thing she has ever done? I have not…and if I did I don’t know that I would believe her!

I think, in the beginning, that I blissfully thought my children would be angels, sleep through the night at 3 weeks, would always share their toys….and the list goes on and on.

Boy was I in for a surprise! 🙂 My first didn’t sleep through the night until he was 3, my labors didn’t go as planned, nursing was awful for the first few weeks and I was an emotional wreck most of the time.

That was my reality….and it wasn’t pretty.

Don’t get me wrong though – my kids are awesome. Dominic and I say all the time that they are the best things that we have done together….they are kind hearted and hard working and caring….

But they are kids – and all kids have their moments….and Karlena had one today.

I got that dreaded e-mail this morning….the one where your wonderful daycare provider has to tell you that your child has hurt someone.  Apparently my sweet princess, 2 year old daughter had pushed another little boy so hard that he hit his head/lip into a bookshelf…was bleeding and now has a fat lip.

Sigh….

And in walks “Mommy guilt”.

Do you know this feeling? The whispers that tell you “if you had been a better mom then this wouldn’t have happened…”, “This behavior is a direct reflection of you”, “How come the other daycare moms don’t have to get these kind of emails?”

Oh that Mommy guilt can be nasty….and if I am not careful I can fall into that trap hard and fast!

So in these times…these not-so proud mama moments….I need to remember that my child is a child of God. Created in His image….

Should I expect them to be perfect?

Absolutely not!! Am i?! (insert lots of laughing and a few snorts here!!) Um NO!

I can use these moments to continue to reinforce the “good” behavior and try and discourage the “negative” behavior.

While I am not proud of my daughter’s behavior today…..it doesn’t make me love her any less. And it is a reminder to me of how much our Father loves us…imperfections and all.

Motherhood is hard…especially in those tough moments where a situation is less than ideal. But keep at it. There are great days around each corner. Proud mama moments that make you forget all the frustrating times. And those moments are worth more than anything!

Love on your kiddos today and remember that if you find yourself in a situation that makes you want to hang your head….there is probably another mama out there feeling the same way. We are not alone in this – don’t ever forget that!! 🙂

I am a “people pleaser”.

Always have been….I am always worried about how my decisions etc will impact those around me. And while this can be seen as something positive about me….it can turn into something negative when I can’t say no and over-commit to everything.

As a FT working mother of 4 kids, I HAVE to be able to say no to things. But it doesn’t come easy to me.  When we lived in SD I found myself in a situation where I had committed to too many things at once. Dominic and I were involved in our church, had various commitments almost every night of the week, time with extended family and then I had volunteered to help with a project at Isaac’s school.

I got involved after a plea for help from another parent when I realized that no one else was signing up….of course I decided that I would be the “rescuer-er”. So even though I didn’t have time, didn’t have a passion for the project, I agreed to help anyways.

And I was sinking.

I found myself frustrated and resentful that I “had” to be involved. And while no one made me sign up….I was angry that I had put myself in that situation. I went to a good friend and shared my predicament.

And she told me that I needed to back away from the project. “But I can’t do that…they are counting on me…how will that make me look?!”

And she told me that I was doing it for the wrong reasons, and that the other people involved would understand.

And so I backed out. I explained where I was at and prayed for grace and understanding. And you know what? I got it!

And it was as if a weight had been lifted….

Sometimes we find ourselves trying to do it all, handle everything, that we don’t leave any room for our God-sized dreams. Sometimes we have to say “no” so that we can say “yes” to the plans that God has for us.

But it is hard and what if people don’t understand?!

I have discovered in my own life that people are MUCH more gracious and understanding than I give them credit for. And when you share your heart with others….you will usually get grace in return.

So start praying about that Go-sized dream of yours…and be willing to let go of the things that are holding you back. It won’t be easy at first, and you may get some resistance….but I have found that when I am doing those things that God desires for me….the right doors open and it becomes less “work” and more fun! 😉

Do you have a hard time saying “no”? What stops you?? I’d love to hear how you plan to start saying “yes” to your dreams!