Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday. I love this because it is just a commitment of five minutes of unedited writing….we can all do that can’t we?? So if you haven’t started this series yet…today’s the day!

Today’s word is BARE – ready, set go –

This goes against what is most comfortable for me…in all honesty I wear a mask much easier than I bare my “real” heart.

You see I have always struggled with the need to be perfect. Or at least the need to make you believe that things are perfect in my life….that I have it all together.

I want you to think that my children are perfect angels, or to think that I always have a countenance of peace and joy. But the truth is, like everyone, I struggle at all of it! 🙂

There are Sunday mornings when Dominic and I are not getting along on the way to church…yet I put on my smile like all is well with the world.

There are morning that I get frustrated and short with my kids….and then apologize as we are driving to school so they won’t have a bad day….

It is the “ugly” truth of who I can be sometimes….and it is difficult to bare that here…be real and transparent and hope for grace.

But God doesn’t call us to be perfect people…..He wants us to be perfect IN Him.

Why do I forget that? Why do I think that you all expect me to be perfect because I write about God here in this space?

I am working through this refining process…learning who God really is to me. Learning that my own worst enemy is me…and that I keep myself at a distance from God’s graces because I place these impossible standards on myself.

But God wants us to approach Him in our barest form….open to being changed and molded into His likeness.

“Take me and mold me, use me, fill me

I give my life to the Potter’s hand Call me,

You guide me, lead me, walk beside me

I give my life to the Potter’s hand”

This is my prayer today…that I be open and transparent and willing to be “seen” by the One who can shape me into the woman He desires me to be.

Fear isn’t a new “issue” in my life.

It seems to be a stronghold in my life that I need to take a deeper look at. And for me, often the fears that I have lead to sin in my life.

The kind of sin where I make choices based of out fear and not faith….choices that hurt those closest to me.

The enemy is keenly aware of my issues with fear and at any possible turn he seeks to wrap tighter the chains of bondage…

Have you ever been there friends? Knowing in your head the Truth, the plan God has for you….but going in a complete and opposite direction because of fear?

I found myself in that very place again this weekend.  I shared here about the recent changes in our home with my husband’s work etc.  No sooner did I post about the faith I had in God’s plan for all of this when the lies started coming….

“This won’t work”, “This was a mistake”, “Your marriage is going to suffer”….

I was bombarded once again with all of the “What-Ifs”.

And I responded in fear…told Dominic I thought it was all a mistake…basically quit before I got started.

Oh yes, I am good like that.

You see I don’t stop to “think”….to process my feelings to determine if they are rational or irrational..I just act out. It is a pattern of behavior that has become the “norm”…but it isn’t healthy and it hurts those that I love the most.

So I am sharing these things here so that I can try and remain accountable….even if in the smallest way. You see I write here about faith and hope and all the ways that God has blessed our lives, in spite of us.

And I believe it…I want you to believe it….find encouragement in it. But I need to be able to live out my faith in a real and tangible way in my everyday life….not just talk about it here…..

This is a growing process…a time of refinement, and I don’t have any doubts that it is going to hurt a little. I am going to make mistakes. But there is hope that as I come through this process, I will be a better wife and mother, a better employee and friend….

I don’t want fear to hold me in chains any longer. So today it is my humble prayer that God will mold me into the woman He wants me to be…and that through that I will find freedom.

What has you in bondage today? Please share with me so that I can pray for your freedom as well….we don’t journey alone and there is one thing that I know works and it is prayer!

 Image Credit

My sister and I had taken a quick weekend trip out to California to visit our brother, his wife and their new daughter. It was a fun weekend – but once we started the trip home we were both just ready to be home.

Have you ever felt like that when traveling?

On each portion of the trip there were “concerns”, potential delays. Knowing how we both needed to make it home that day, I just kept praying that God would be in the details….no delays, no lost luggage etc.

And while both flights took off late, both flights arrived early, no luggage was lost….but on our flight into Sioux Falls we were heading into heavy fog. It wasn’t until we landed safely that we found out we had been the only flight to land that day…all other flights had been re-routed or cancelled.

 Yes God had been in the details that day. But isn’t He every day?

When we were coming in Beth and I talked about how the pilots navigate in thick fog like that….that they have to rely on the plane’s autopilot system to keep the plane in the right flying position. (Forgive my non technical FAA lingo here) 🙂

And it got me to thinking….who is the autopilot in my life?

I think that, when I am willing to give up the reins, God is that autopilot. Many times I have been in a thick fog….unsure where to go, what the best choice is….and especially during those times I need to trust in God’s plan for my life and ask for His guidance.

Ultimately He knows the direction He has set out for me. I can trust that…or I can take over, divert my “plane” so to speak and take an alternate route.  Unfortunately I have multiple examples in my life when I have thought that I knew best, or I was too scared to trust in the unknown….and in the end I paid the price for my choices.

Since Dominic started his own business we have always felt the whole situation was blessed….things happened, outside of our “control” for the good…and we could only sit back, shake our heads in amazement, and thank God for all of it.

In the past couple of months it became apparent that he could no longer handle the workload on his own, and he asked me if I would come and work with him.  Leaving the “comforts” of my current job left me in fear. I prayed and prayed about it….felt God’s leading, but just couldn’t fully trust His plan. So I decided to “control” the situation and set to trying to manage both jobs, each part time.

Have you ever found yourself overwhelmed by your own doing?

This is where I found myself….trying to do my best in both positions…and constantly feeling under stress because it wasn’t possible to get all the work done that was there. And having too-high of expectations for myself that I should be able to get it all done.

It was no ones fault but my own really. And I knew it. And then I got sick (turns out I have a stomach ulcer) and I realized that I was “wearing” the physical stress from my choices.

And in that moment, when I felt I was flying in a fog, it was as if the fog lifted. I knew what I had to do. And while the decision is still scary for me….I recognize that it IS God’s plan for my life.

This week I made the decision to leave my job with the guaranteed monthly pay and work full time with Dominic. Never in our marriage have we been in this situation….where we are relying on one salary to support our family. It is new territory for us, but it is exciting!

I believe that God had this plan all along.  In our almost 17 years of marriage we have faced some amazing trials. We have been through terrible heartache and almost given up on each other…

The fact that we will now be working together, side by side, to grow what is now a family business is just proof of God’s miracles working in our lives.

The “unknown” can feel like a scary place – but it doesn’t have to be when we place our trust in our one true autopilot.

God is there in the known and the unknown. It is our decision on how we will “respond” to His leading. What do you find yourself facing today? Are you trusting God with the details? He IS there….lean into that truth today and fly!

Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday. I love this because it is just a commitment of five minutes of unedited writing….we can all do that can’t we?? So if you haven’t started this series yet…today’s the day!

Today’s word is AFRAID – ready, set go –

I find myself afraid a lot. Worried about the decisions I have made, worried about the “worst case scenario”. Do you find yourself there too?

When my husband doesn’t answer his cell phone right away, and he is on the road, he must be in a ditch somewhere….crazy right?

Fear is one of those things in my life that the enemy attacks most. Knowing that it is a way to keep me down – focused on all of the “what ifs” and not on the peace that comes with trusting God.

“Do not fear, for I am with you;
Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, surely I will help you,
Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand” Isaiah 41:10

This needs to be my mantra….God IS with me.

He is MY God.

He will strengthen me, He will help me, He will uphold me with His right hand.

So many beautiful promises in those words.

And when I reflect back on all of the difficult situations in my life I can see those promises played out.

He HAS been there.

He HAS given me strength, He HAS helped me and upheld me.

He IS my God.

No longer should I face my day afraid…but confident in the plan that my God has for me.

Heads held high sisters….heads held high!

Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday. I love this because it is just a commitment of five minutes of unedited writing….we can all do that can’t we?? So if you haven’t started this series yet…today’s the day!

Today’s word is AGAIN – ready, set go –

I love the idea that you can start your day over again at any time….

Have you ever considered that? That despite the things that come at you throughout the day…that they don’t have to determine what the remainder of your day will be like?

I am a negative girl by nature. I don’t know why but life has a way of stressing me out. It can be little things like the kids being too crazy in the morning, or feeling rushed as we get ready….it will be 8am and I am feeling overwhelmed.

But my loving husband will will remind me that my mornings don’t have shape what that rest of my day will be like. I have the opportunity to start my day over again.

Such a simple idea, but one that I think we don’t utilize often enough. You see, I have high expectations of myself in all things. When I fail (and let me be clear…usually only I think I have failed) I get frustrated…and frustration turns into being harsh with those I love. #fail.

BUT, by using this simple idea, of starting my day over again, I am given the chance to apologize for my shortcomings, accept the grace that is always offered to me…and start my day, at any time, over again.

Thank God for that gift in my life. So wherever you are today, if it isn’t a good place – remember that it can be. Just choose to start again.

I am so excited for you all to meet a wonderful new friend of mine. We are both part of the “dream team” and are also “buddies”. It has been so much fun getting to know Jenn over the past few weeks and I am in love with her heart for God and others!  I asked her if she would be willing to come and share about herself a little here because I know once you meet her you will all love her like I do! And while you are at it please stop over and “like” her FB page so you can keep updated on new things as they come!

What an honor to write a guest post for my new friend and cheerleader Kristin.

She offered me the chance to come on over to her beautiful space and share a little bit about me and my ministry. What a joy!

Well I am off the chart extrovert, scoring 100 percent in the extrovert category so I have no problem finding words to share with you. J  Actually though, if you had known me up until after high school, I was quiet and shy.  That was mainly a mixture of some painful insecurities that came from those” mean girls” who gave mean labels. But once Jesus began to show me who I was in Him, slowly building up God-fidence in me, I started to break out of my shy shell.  So let’s pretend like we are sitting in Starbucks having coffee together.

First I want to hear about you and your dreams. How can I dream right along with you?

Then I would love to share with you about how I am living out mine. See I was called into missions and ministry at a young age. I remember forcing my friends to go to Bible club on the playground when I was in elementary school. I would teach them from my little precious moments Bible.  No swinging or kickball for me.

After I went on my first mission trip in 7^th grade I also was hooked on this thing called missions. I just knew I wanted to do it.

After college God surprised me and called me to go to grad school (that is a whole other story) After getting a master s in Christian psychological studies God surprised me again.  He called me to give up everything and go live as a missionary in Nepal.  I thought for life.  So I did. I said goodbye to everything and everyone I knew and love to follow a call of a God who I loved more than anything and who gave away everything (HIS OWN SON) to love me!

So I spent two amazing years in Nepal. Away from every comfort possible, learning to live alive in the comfort of the arms of the Lord. It was a mixture of the hardest days and most wonderful days of my life.  While there I truly learned to Come alive.

Then I began feeling God  whispering to my heart I have more Jenn, I have a calling to impact ladies all over the world.  So I had to say yes to God.  Which meant in 2009 saying no to living in Nepal for the rest of my life and returning back to America, unsure of what this new call would look like.

When I returned back to America I noticed something that broke my heart.  In Nepal I was surrounded by people worshipping dead gods all around me. I came back to the Bible belt of the south and saw people who said they knew the One true God, Jesus Christ, and yet were dead and numb inside.

So God birthed a new calling inside of me, that had to start in me.  Live alive every day in Christ.  Continually find what makes you comes alive and do it.  And then encourage and challenge others to come alive in Christ. Provide an invitation for them to come alive Jenn.

So coming alive ministries was birthed.  And I am having a blast living out this calling. It could mean anything from inviting you to come sit in my counseling office in Chattanooga and let me get the sacred honor of hearing you share your heart.  Or it could be a coaching session where I cheer you into where you feel God leading you.  Or it could be taking a coming alive women’s conference to Haiti and loving on the woman and orphans there at an orphanage.  Or it can be when we got to host a missionary conference last year and provide a weekend of pampering for 8 missionaries on furlough from very difficult places.  Or it could be pulling off on a shoestring budget or Bloom conferences which reached over 450 woman last year.

I am having a ball coming alive.  Now what makes you come alive?

See – what did I say…isn’t she awesome?! Thank you Jenn for sharing your heart….and next time you plan a mission trip to Haiti let me know…..I may have to find a way to come along! 🙂

I can still remember those football games….

We were young, 7th and 8th grade I think…. I grew up on a block with several other girls that were all the same age/grade as I was. And with 2 sets of twins. Oh how I always wanted to be a twin…but that is another story!

The twins had an older sister who was a cheerleader. She was beautiful, had long hair, was thin and popular…and she was one of those girls that led the crowd at football games. So even before we were in high school ourselves we started going to games.

I think I have always felt like there was something “more” to life, and somehow I just hadn’t gotten the message on what that was….or how to get it. But this girl…this cheerleader – she had it all together.

So when I started high school I knew that if I was finally going to get the “it” that I was seeking….the best place to start was to be the part. The cheerleader.

I really took the practices serious. I wanted to learn the cheers and do them perfectly. I just knew THIS was what I needed to be popular myself. I prayed about it all the time. God knew how important this was to me and I was sure that because I was praying about it….that He would make my dream come true.

Tryout day came and I did my very best. The jumps, the cheers…I gave it my all. I’ll admit, I wasn’t the best. I have very tight hamstrings which make it very difficult to touch my toes and do the spits etc. Don’t even get me started on the V-sit and reach…that portion of the Presidential Fitness program was a nightmare for me! 🙂  So I knew I had work to do, but I had prayed about it and tried so hard…..so God would reward that wouldn’t He?

Then came the “reveal” day.  We all knew that at the end of the day the varsity cheerleaders would be coming to the classrooms with a balloon and a bear and the girl(s) chosen would be getting one.  I was so nervous, the door opened and I was holding my breath.

But the balloon and the bear weren’t for me. And I was heartbroken. God hadn’t answered my prayers. I struggled with this for a long time….

Fast forward several years. Those few years in high school are long unimportant. The disappointment of my non-popularity is no longer a priority. But interestingly, it seems that once-dream of being a cheerleader is coming true today…

Just not in the way that I ever thought. You see one of my “gifts” is encouragement. I like to find out how others are doing, follow up with them and pray for them….encouraging them along their journeys.

Being a “cheerleader” for others seems to come naturally for me!  As our group of dreamers continues to explore all that God has planned for us, we have paired up with a few other dreamers in the hopes to be an encouragement to them.

None of us need to walk this path alone!

Don’t you love how God works? He doesn’t promise that just because you pray He will “give you what you want”…..but He does hear every prayer….and sometimes He has something more rewarding planned.

I have been paired with 2 beautiful women, Margie and Jenn, and I can’t wait to have you “meet” them…in fact (they don’t know this yet) but I am hoping they would both guest post here later this week and share a little bit about who they are and the beautiful ministries they are both a part of….you will love it I promise!!

Do you have a “buddy”, someone who encourages you as you journey?? Brag about them here!! 🙂

Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday. I love this because it is just a commitment of five minutes of unedited writing….we can all do that can’t we?? So if you haven’t started this series yet…today’s the day!

Today’s word is CHERISHED – ready, set go –

I forget so often that I am a cherished daughter of the King.

I tend to focus on all of my shortcomings….the impatience I showed to my sweet children, the harsh words/tone I used towards my husband.

So many failures in a day’s time.

But that can’t be my focus. Sure, I am broken….but isn’t that the very reason that God sent His only Son for me…for you?

Because I am broken, sin-filled….yet in spite of me, He cherished me, and so much that He gave the ultimate sacrifice for me.

Humbling isn’t it? But such a gift to be loved like this.

While I am sure that I will continue to make mistakes, continue to act in a way unbecoming of this  gift – it is comforting to know that I can return to the foot of the cross and find forgiveness.

I don’t know where you find yourself this morning. Maybe you feel that the weight of your past is just too much to be forgiven.

Maybe you have given up all hope that God could forgive “someone like you”.

Please hear me friends on this. I have been there. My list of disappointments and failures is long….and for a long time I believed it was those things that were keeping me from God’s love.

But that was so far from the truth. It was my own shame and pride that kept God at arms length from me. He was always there…I just wasn’t always ready to receive His love.

Accept His covering this morning.

Find yourself at the foot of the cross He prepared for you and be free of any failures, and shame….

Know that where you are – right at this moment – you are cherished.

Starting today you can register and become a part of a group in your community. The actual day of the conference is April 27, 2013.

So what’s this conference going to be about?? Well in their own words…
“This year we’re taking a closer look at what it takes to stay rooted in community when sometimes just walking away would be so much easier and tons more convenient.”

Oh and did I mention that it is free this year?! AND if you sign up today you will also get a (in)courage 365 Daybrightener…so don’t wait!! 

Click on the link to watch the video below to learn more…and then register to attend in a community near you!! And if you are in the Marshall area (or want to make a road trip) sign up for the group I have already started!! I would love to host again…but also want to see if it is someone else’s hearts desire to do it first! Either way I will be there and would love to hang with you!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-5axInVxlw&feature=youtu.be

Linking up with Lisa Jo again this week to participate in Five Minute Friday. I love this because it is just a commitment of five minutes of unedited writing….we can all do that can’t we?? So if you haven’t started this series yet…today’s the day! 🙂

Today’s word is DIVE – ready, set go –

I feel like this word describes my life well right now…like I have jumped in to something new and exciting.

I am on this journey of discovering who I am, who God created me to be, as a part of this team of “dreamers”,

It is a little intimidating because these ladies are amazing writers and I feel “less than” at times….but I have to remember that God made me – fully unique – and that He has a special plan for this time in my life too.

No need to compare or be worried that I don’t measure up…but instead I need to dive into Him, trusting that He has me here as a part of this group for a reason…and that is enough.

It is enough. Believe that for yourself today…that wherever God has placed you today….it is for a purpose – dive into that in full trust and don’t look back!